


Happily Ever After

by YumeNoTsuzuki (Yumejin)



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe, Hidan's colourful language I guess?, Pre-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-18
Updated: 2017-08-18
Packaged: 2018-12-17 02:02:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11841654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yumejin/pseuds/YumeNoTsuzuki
Summary: Hidan has an Important Mission, Naruto gets locked in an empty classroom, Konoha is probably doomed.





	Happily Ever After

**Author's Note:**

> Written for farrier-collins.tumblr.com because we had a sudden need for 'what if Hidan raised Naruto?' :D

‘Lists of supplies for the school trip?’ Hidan squinted suspiciously at the scroll Naruto had just handed him. ‘What the fuck is this shit?’

‘It’s just stuff like my toothbrush and cup ramen, dattebayo,’ the young blonde ginned. This earned him a playful hit on the head.

‘Cup ramen? Cut the crap, I don’t have to read the goddamned list to know that garbage isn’t on it.’ Hidan snorted. ‘Konoha comes up with the most useless, soft bullshit for their children.’

‘I’m gonna group up with Shika and Chouji, it’s gonna be the greatest sleepover EVER!’ The boy bounced all over the room with excitement, effectively ignoring his guardian.

Hidan loved to complain, Naruto loved to shout - it was perfect.

 

The day of the trip Naruto left early, his backpack drooping with the heavy weight of ramen cups and far too many Cool Ninja Scrolls. Hidan’s parenting style didn’t stress helping him prepare for anything - he would later learn the hard way that it’s very embarrassing to not have a change of clothes when all your friends are around to judge you. But Naruto learning from his mistakes is a story for another day.

 

The plan for the trip consisted of the teachers taking the entire class of about 20 kids camping in the nearby woods, some minor survival training and team exercises. It was nothing too complicated and there was virtually no danger to them in the forest, but to the aspiring little ninjas this was incredibly exciting.

‘I wonder if I brought enough snacks,’ Chouji wondered aloud, while they stood around in front of the school.

‘I’ve got tons of ramen, I’ll share with you!’ Naruto grinned at his friend.

‘I just hope it doesn’t rain, I want to get some sleep…’ Shikamaru yawned. Someone bumped into him, but he was too tired to bother turning around to see who it was. Whatever.

‘Is everyone ready?’ Iruka-sensei called out, gathering everyone’s attention. ‘We’re leaving in five minutes so make sure you haven’t left anything behind!’

‘What a drag..’

‘Ehh? Where’s my bag?’ Naruto blinked confusedly. He was sure it had been sitting right behind him!

‘Did you forget it at home?’ Chouji munched on a chip.

‘He had it with him when he arrived… obviously someone took it,’ Shikamaru cringed. Naruto was already running off.

‘I’m gonna go look for it! Don’t leave without me, dattebayo!’ the blonde dashed back to the Academy.

He noticed it on the teacher’s desk in their usual classroom.

‘Huh? It’s just sitting there?’ He ran up to grab it (not before making sure all the ramen was still there). He’d only just picked it up when the door to the room slammed shut and locked with an audible click.

‘What? Hey, I’m still in here!’ Let me out!’ Naruto cried, running up the door just in time to ear an ominous giggling fading into the distance.

 

Ami and her gang must have finally got bored of picking on Sakura… Naruto clenched his fists. She’d left him alone this long, so why now! He threw the bag back down on the floor in frustration. It was no use, Ami was mean just because she loved being mean, there was never anything else to it. She’d always been a bully, even before they started school.

 

‘I bet they’ve finished roll call now,’ he ran to the window, looking down at the courtyard. There was no one left there. He was going to miss the trip! Even more importantly, he was trapped in the classroom.

The door was definitely locked tight and wouldn't even budge when he pushed it. Even when he eventually managed to climb up on the window sill, he couldn’t reach the handle to open the window. What felt like hours passed, while Naruto stared hopelessly out of the window. No one was even coming by to help, he was going to stay in this empty room forever. He didn’t even notice when he’d started crying until he suddenly couldn’t calm down at all.

‘Help! Someone!’ he involuntarily hiccuped. His nose was running now too. ‘Help!’

The door flew off it’s hinges, startling him into silence.

‘Thought I heard some crying brat making a racket.’ Hidan waltzed in, arms crossed and a displeased scowl on his face. ‘Thought I’d stop by to have a word with the teach about the nonsense they tea- ugh whatever. Why are you in here?’

‘I wasn’t crying,’ Naruto said quickly and wiped the tears and snot from his face with the end of his sleeve. Hidan’s eye twitched.

‘Uh-huh.’

‘I just..forgot my bag in here..dattebayo’ Naruto trailed off, unsure how to explain everything. ‘Ami was just being mean as always..’

‘I think I see where this is going.’ Hidan could just sacrifice the little bitch to Jashin - problem solved - but this did seem a little heavy-handed, all things considered. He was supposed to be on a secret mission or whatever. Pein came up with some shitty plans.

‘You should prank the hell out of her later,’ he shrugged.

Naruto grinned, even though his face was still puffy from crying. But the happy expression vanished just as quickly as it appeared.

‘I’ve missed the trip.. They went on without me,’ he confessed to Hidan, looking at his feet.

‘What are you talking about?’ Shikamaru’s voice rang out and the boy peeked into the room. ‘Sensei’s downstairs, looking for you while everyone waits inside. It started raining.’ The young Nara then turned around. ‘I found him!’ he yelled down the hall and someone shouted an acknowledgement back. Seconds later Chouji appeared in the doorway too.

‘Are you okay Naruto?’ he asked with concern.

Naruto wiped the last of the dampness of his face and nodded vigorously.

‘Let’s hurry up and go, dattebayo!’ he exclaimed.

Just as he was about to charge off, Hidan stopped him, roughly grabbing his sleeve.

‘Not so fast.’ Naruto blinked owlishly, confused. ‘You forgot to take your amulet, the one thing I definitely told you to fucking take,’ Hidan hissed quietly and thrust a silver necklace into the boy’s hand. ‘What do you do if you get into trouble?’

Naruto grinned. ‘I just splash a bit of blood on it! Like for a summ.. summoning jutsu!’ he replied quietly, tripping over the difficult word a little. It was their secret technique. He’d been dying to actually see what it does.

‘Right,’ Hidan nodded. ‘And don’t lose it, damn it. Now hurry up, they’re all waiting for you. Guess I’ll talk to the goody two shoes teach later. What kind of a school has only two teachers anyways, what the fuck.’

 

Naruto had already ran off with his friends, not listening to his rant.

 

_‘May the blessing of immortals protect this child. Praise be to Jashin,’_ he whispered. It was a shitty job but someone had to keep the Kyuubi vessel alive until they could kill him and take the beast, after all.


End file.
